Wednesday 22 May 2019

The 365 Day Challenge - Questions for April to June

Below are the questions for the first three months of the internet phenomenon/cultural behemoth/almost legendarily pointless waste of time that is the #365DayChallenge.

Link to questions Jan 1 - Mar 31

April 1: You are a Cabinet minister . What will be the personal scandal that brings you down?
April 2: If you had to perform a dance of your own invention on Strictly Come Dancing what would it be called?
April 3: What inanimate object in your house do you wish could talk?
April 4: Apart from less hours and more money, what single thing would improve your working day?
April 5: Your parents turn up unannounced. What’s the first thing you hide?
April 6: Do you have any non famous friends who look like famous people?
April 7: You are allowed to replace the Hollywood sign with nine letters of your choice.
April 8: What’s the one item of clothing from your past you wish you still owned?
April 9: What film do you most associate with your mother?
April 10: Have you ever dumped someone and gone on to massively regret it?
April 11: You make the front page of most of the newspapers tomorrow. What have you done?!!
April 12: What’s the most trivial thing you would reconsider a friendship over?
April 13: What is your favourite piece of trivial knowledge?
April 14: What’s the most surreal piece of shopping you’ve ever done?
April 15: What is the one joke you know that always makes you laugh?
April 16: What bit of common place knowledge still foxes you, but you’re too ashamed to ask in case you look like a giant numpty?
April 17: What are the secret nicknames you have for your work colleagues?
April 18: What’s the most pathetic way you have ever injured yourself?
April 19: If you could rename one country, what would you rename it?

BONUS QUESTION from @cherryaimless - What’s the best/worst thing you’ve eaten drunk after checking your fridge?

April 20: Have you ever been the reason for a party/bar/restaurant to go suddenly very silent?
April 21: What are the best biscuits?
April 22: If you had to write the 11th and 12th commandments - what would they be?
April 23: Who was the first person you followed on Twitter?
April 24: What food stuff do you most wish you hated the taste of?
April 25 You’re asked by your school to give a speech describing your time there – the stipulation is that the opening line is the opening line of a well known song – what song do you go for?
April 26: What’s the one journey you’d most like to make?
April 27: If you could say one thing to the Queen, without any recriminations, what would it be?
April 28: Who was the weirdest kid in your class at school?
April 29: What’s yer walk-on darts music?
April 30: What are the things that, in terms of you losing your rag, would take you straight from Def Con Five to Def Con One?

May 1: As it’s my Dads birthday please tell us of a time your dad embarrassed you.
May 2: On a night out, what's the furthest you've travelled between first drinks and waking up
May 3: In the sitcom of your life, what would be your catchphrase?
May 4: If you could hack into anyone’s account on Twitter (and let me say that a) such behaviour is wrong and b) this is supposed to be a silly game not an episode of The Moral Maze) - whose account would hack and what would your first tweet be?
May 5: What font sums you up best as a person?
May 6: GUEST QUESTION from @mickmuldoon - What’s the worst question you were asked in a job interview?
May 7: You’re allowed to parachute one person into North Sentinel Island. Who’s getting the short vacation?
May 8: What’s your favourite “please don’t let too many people find out about this place” erm place on earth?
May 9: If you could know the answer to one question, what would it be?
May 10: What referendum question WOULD bring Britain back together?
May 11: What do you most like about your appearance?
May 12: Have you ever broken something at someone else’s house?
May 13: If you could be invisible for a day, where would you go first?
May 14: Merge two films starring the same lead actor to make an incredible film. Describe the mashed up plot.
May 15: What’s the one line in a song that always makes you cry?
May 16: Add the word “roulette” to the town where you live to make a dangerously exciting new game. Describe this game.
May 17: You’re at the Pearly Gates. You’re down as a Maybe. What’s the one thing you could point to and say “Hey I should get into Heaven for that seed alone”?
May 18: What sitcom character do you most identify with?
May 19: What’s the most embarrassing toilet based anecdote you are prepared to share?
May 20: The world ends at midnight. You throw a small dinner party and can invite any three people you like. Who’s coming and what’s the final meal?
May 21: If you had to die in the same way as a character from a film, which way would you go?

BONUS QUESTION - Which actor do you think is underrated?

May 22: GUEST QUESTION from @twoclownseating - What unusual smell do you like/love?

May 23: What's the biggest contrast in how you've ended a day compared to how you started it?
May 24: If you had three slots on a tv channel for a day with your own content and no old repeats - what would you put on for these times - 0700-0900, 1700-1800 and 2100-2200?
May 25: GUEST QUESTION from @bpiwbig - You have just travelled back to your 11 old self at the start of the summer holidays - what would you change to make it more memorable and set you on the path to happiness?

May 26: What is the strangest gift you ever received?
May 27: GUEST QUESTION from @wedzx2003 - What was your favourite toy as a child?
May 28: Tell us about a time you came to regret using foul language
May 29: What feeling or state should there be a medical word for?
May 30: GUEST QUESTIONS from @ChapmanBaxter - What's the most mundane connection you have with a celebrity OR Who's the most famous person you didn't recognise when you met them?
May 31: Name an actor where you'd like one of their characters to be in the situation of another

June 1: GUEST QUESTION from @zellishrose - If you could put together your ultimate fantasy band/duo - who would be in it and what would they be called?
June 2: What is your worst habit?
June 3: Tell me your fantasy cover versions.
June 4: Have you ever had a phantasmagorical / spooky / haunted / supernatural experience?
June 5: GUEST QUESTION from @walshie_neil - Have you ever been caught out doing something when you thought you were alone?
June 6: Who broke your heart first?
June 7: Everyone you’ve ever met is voting to describe you in two words. One is a positive character trait, the other isn’t. What do you reckon the votes will say?
June 8: GUEST QUESTION from @Rover9495 - You can bring a dead celeb back to life, but only in the world of Corrie. Who is it and what's their storyline?
June 9: GUEST QUESTION from @k8andrews - What do you always instruct house guests not to do?
June 10: GUEST QUESTION from @NickDentsBrain - What is your Dragon's Den surefire winner?
June 11: GUEST QUESTION from @_TUMULUS - Which celebrity face off do you most want to see?

BONUS QUESTION - What is your favourite novel/short story and who would you most like to direct a movie adaptation of it?

June 12: What were the best and worst calendar years of your life?

BONUS QUESTION - What's the strangest thing a guest has done at your house?

June 13: What realistic step could you take today to start improving your life?
June 14: GUEST QUESTION from @BananaFoxJones - If you could add one rule to any sport, what would it be?
June 15: Has a seemingly trivial moment in your life actually gone on to change it?
June 16: GUEST QUESTION from @StephenMonk1970 - What is the tagline to the movie of your life?
June 17: Today I'm asking you for the people in your life who made a lasting impression despite the briefest of connections. Based on Bernstein's parasol girl memory in Citizen Kane.
June 18: Do you remember your first conversation with your best friend? What was it about?
June 19: GUEST QUESTION from @sgt_rendall - Which bold question would you ask which celeb?
June 20: If you could relive yesterday, what is the one thing you would change about your day?
June 21: We played Snog, Marry, Avoid with some photos. It was not an unparallelled success.

BONUS GUEST QUESTION from @danielson264- Fill in the gammony gap in this statement - BLANK, that's what's wrong with this country.

June 22: Do you have a lucky or unlucky number in your life and why is it so?
June 23: Presuming reincarnation is an actual thing, what or who do you think you were in the life before this one?
June 24: GUEST QUESTION from @drunkenbutcher- What's the minor character flaw that someone could have which will instantly tell you you won't be friends?

BONUS QUESTION - What's the minor personality trait that someone could have that would make you instantly want to be mates?

June 25: GUEST QUESTION from @peterglennie - Which song do you have the most extreme automatic response to, but you're not sure why?
June 26: Have you ever used a fortune teller or clairvoyant?

BONUS QUESTION - What do YOU do when you can't sleep.....?

June 27: Have you ever been a spectator at a sporting event and been hit by the ball?
June 28: GUEST QUESTION from @SparkyInTheUK - What was the first single/album you bought and do you still have it?
June 29: Have you ever walked in on someone doing something you’d rather not have seen.
June 30: If you had to have the speaking voice of a celebrity who would you a) most like to have and b) least like to have?

The 365 Day Challenge - The First 90 Questions!

Below are the questions for the first three months of the internet phenomenon/cultural behemoth/almost legendarily pointless waste of time that is the #365DayChallenge


Jan 1: If you had to go out on the sauce with one of the Mr. Men or Little Misses, who would you choose? 
Jan 2: Who do you know in real life that they should make a movie franchise about? 
Jan 3: Have you ever seen one of your friends wank off an animal? 
Jan 4: Have you ever smashed a household appliance in a temper tantrum? 
Jan 5: What’s the stupidest thing you’ve said during sex? 
Jan 6: What’s the most number of drinks you’ve bought in a single round? 
Jan 7: What country’s shape do you think most looks like a celebrity? 
Jan 8: What’s the stupidest thing you’ve done in a foreign country? 
Jan 9: If you were at the crucifixion of Jesus, and they had Twitter, what hashtag would you use to describe the events? 
Jan 10: What’s the oddest thing you’ve ever had to wear for work? 
Jan 11: Which Bill Murray character would you most like to be? 
Jan 12: What celebrity death are you most dreading? 
Jan 13: What’s the best reason you’ve ever been late for work? 
Jan 14: Have you ever found yourself inadvertently following someone late at night and ended up shouting something meant to be reassuring like “It’s alright I’m not a rapist.”? 
Jan 15: Have you ever been told off by a ticket inspector on a train for non-ticket-related activity? 
Jan 16: Is there someone on your contacts list on your phone listed under a nickname they don’t know they have? 
Jan 17: Have you ever worn something on a night out that has gone on to ruin your night in some sort of injury or malfunction type episode? 
Jan 18: What movie would you most like to see a black and white remake of? 
Jan 19: What’s the funniest thing you’ve ever seen at a funeral? 
Jan 20: What’s the punchline to the sickest joke you know? 
Jan 21: What’s the biggest thing you’ve ever been asked to do by means of returning a favour? 
Jan 22: What act of heroism do you think you should have been awarded a Victoria Cross for? 
Jan 23: Have you ever eaten from a buffet before it was officially opened? 
Jan 24: What was the biggest meltdown a teacher at your school had? 
Jan 25: Have you (or anyone you know) ever attempted anything you saw on television that was preceded by a “Don’t Try This At Home” message? 
Jan 26: Have you ever photobombed a stranger? 
Jan 27: What’s the biggest news story you were somehow unaware of for at least a few hours? 
Jan 28: What’s the worst “caught the wrong bus/train” situation you’ve been in? 
Jan 29: What's the best thing you've ever won?
Jan 30: Have you ever fancied your doctor/dentist?
Jan 31: Have you ever had to call the fire brigade out due to a cooking mishap? 
 
Feb 1: Have you ever broken into a building? 
Feb 2: What would your gladiator name be?
Feb 3: Have you ever said something regrettable in your sleep?
Feb 4: Which country would you most like to write a national anthem for? And what would the first line be?
Feb 5: Have you ever prematurely celebrated something only for it to go pear-shaped?
Feb 6: Who was the first person you ever swore at?
Feb 7: You're allowed to rename one building "The Temple Of [YOUR NAME]" - which building do you choose?
Feb 8: Have you got a magic skill that is of no use at all? Like I am able to tell the colour of a Jelly Baby just by touch.
Feb 9: If you were a disciple like Doubting Thomas, what personal quality would precede your forename?
Feb 10: Have you ever seen a TV show of film and been absolutely certain that you had absolutely the same idea?
Feb 11: Have you ever been rude to a customer?
Feb 12: Which film character do you think deserves a good kicking?
Feb 13: Do you know someone who has either a) regularly undeserved slices of good fortune fall their way or b) heartbreakingly regular instances of godawful bad luck?
Feb 14: Have you ever gone on a date and accidentally covered them in beer/food/sick etc?
Feb 15: Do any of your friends use your name as an adjective for a behaviour associated with you?
Feb 16: Have you ever walked past a live news broadcast?
Feb 17: Is there a sporting team that you literally could not stomach winning the most predigious title they could possibly win?
Feb 18: NASA have chosen you to write the first 10 words to be uttered by an astronaut setting foot on Mars. What immortal words do you choose?
Feb 19: Have you ever visited somewhere as a tourist and neglected to visit one of the obvious landmarks in the area?
Feb 20: If you had all of Superman's powers, but only for one minute, what would you do with that minute?
Feb 21: Have you ever danced at work?
Feb 22: What, as yet unpunished "crime", do you feel merits a life sentence?
Feb 23: Have you ever been caught doing an impression of someone by the person you were doing an impression of?
Feb 24: Have you ever been asked/been thrown out of somewhere?
Feb 25: Have you ever pretended to like a band/be into judo/be vegan or something else to try and impress someone you fancy?
Feb 26: Have you ever trodden in wet cement/sat on wet painted bench, that sort of thing?
Feb 27: What, if anything, would you genuinely riot over?
Feb 28: What's the funniest thing you've heard a next door neighbour say?
 
Mar 1: Do you know anyone who has ever earned £250 from sending a video to You've Been Framed or featured in a You've Been Framed video?
Mar 2: What's the funniest real life wanking story you've heard?
Mar 3: What is your most niche interest?
Mar 4: Have you ever had a song dedicated to you on the radio / in a shit nightclub etc?
Mar 5: What's the latest you've ever been to something?
Mar 6: Have you ever accidentally killed someone's pet or injured someone else's child in a pet sitting / babysitting disaster?
Mar 7: Have you ever gone away for a dirty weekend that's gone disastrously wrong?
Mar 8: Which cultural phenomenon did you feel like the only person in the world who didn't get it?
Mar 9: What's the worst holiday you've ever been on?
Mar 10: Have you ever quit a job in a tantrum
Mar 11: What was the worst thing a teacher ever said to you?
Mar 12: Have you ever given, intentionally or otherwise, someone the wrong directions to somewhere?
Mar 13: Do you have any ethical inconsistencies? Like donating to PETA but think bullfighting should get a pass because of culture and stuff?
Mar 14: If you were on Who Wants to be a Millionaire and reached the million pound question what's the one subject you would most want that question to be on?
Mar 15: Give a shout out to anyone or anything you feel is doing brilliant, noble, good stuff in the world
Mar 16: Do you have a “thing” about people with certain first names? Like, do you seem to shag an awful lot of Claires? Or have a lifelong aversion to Roys.
Mar 17: What’s the most rock and roll thing you’ve ever done?
Mar 18: Have you ever seen someone famous in a bathroom?
Mar 19: Have you ever told a friend that you can’t stand their partner?
Mar 20: What’s the biggest faux pas you’ve ever committed?
Mar 21: Have you ever had a dirty dream about a celebrity you would normally be repulsed by?
Mar 22: Have you ever been introduced to someone and burst out laughing at their name?
Mar 23: Excluding friends that you have met and are already extremely aroused by, who amongst your Twitter pals do you suspect is the sexiest?
Mar 24: If you could suddenly be brilliant at one sport, what would it be?
Mar 25: What’s your one personal drink or drugs experience that you would use as a cautionary tale?
Mar 26: What’s your catchphrase?
Mar 27: Who, from your school days, would you most like to apologise to?
Mar 28: There’s lots of things people would do for a million quid but what is the lowest amount you’d accept to do something you’re terrified of?
Mar 29: What is the single most tasteless thing you own?
Mar 30: Have you ever assisted a magician/hypnotist etc on stage?
Mar 31: With which fictional character do you most identify?
 


 

Wednesday 15 May 2019

The 365 Day Challenge - The Movie.

I just wanted to write something to thank everyone who has participated so far in the daily diversion tactic that is the 365 day challenge.

The last few months of 2018 were probably the most difficult of my life. I was in a very low place mentally and physically and my tweets had become more poisonous and bitter than ever before. And this is coming from somebody who if you search "fourfoot corden" well you'll get the gist.

When I joined Twitter properly (I joined in 2009, didn't post for two years) in 2011 (thanks @sianz you absolute fucking monster for ruining my life with this by the way) I was almost instantly hooked. You make a stranger laugh at something you say and then they share it and then they follow you and you chat about shit you've got in common and a connection, albeit one powered by digits and electricity and technology and all that electroshit, is made. I won't add to the chorus of people saying Twitter isn't what it used to be. I'll agree it's a darker place but I contributed to some of that darkness, and it bit back. I wanted my Twitter area to be one where I made friends instead of lost them.

So, late 2018, I decide I want to give something back. I hit upon the idea of a small daily question that people could respond to. It wasn't the most radical or groundbreaking of ideas but there you go. I wanted the questions to be a mix of the profound and the profane, to amuse and occasionally inspire. I never thought for one second it would be nearly as much hard work as it became but that's my fault. I wrote out 365 questions in advance, powered by late night red wine and office coffee. You can tell my state of mind by the first week's questions which involved getting pissed with Mr Men and wanking off animals.

Lots of people seem to look forward to the challenge and some days it's impossible to keep up with the responses. Sometimes I've almost immediately regretted the question, not seeing how it could be misinterpreted. Where I've made mistakes, I've tried to apologise. So far I've only received one barrel of personal abuse by direct message and, looking back, maybe I had that coming.

I just wanted to say thank you to all who contribute to this silly hashtag game. I've long given up asking people to use the hashtag because fuck it, it's all bollocks anyway. People can join in or not, they don't need to follow rules. So many of you have become regular contributors whose answers always make me smile, laugh or nod in a knowing way. Some days the questions don't really land many answers or responses, others it goes mad. There's no way of knowing which ones will hit.

My thanks especially to @cherryaimless for stepping into the breach when i needed some time to escape, @mickmuldoon for coming up with a question which was so much nicer than the one i was going to ask, @KathyBurke for ensuring my phone goes fucking nuts when she joins in, @riffraffhands for being there to tell me not to quit when I really wanted to and all of you who made this hellsite a better place for me again especially @mariadonovanwri, @kevinmagoo72 and @BananaFoxJones - if I've forgotten anyone I'll mention you when they make a film about it and it wins the Oscar and I have to go make a speech.

It wouldn't work without you. I love you all. Sorry about all the swears.

Paul.